A breathlessness has settled in my lungs of late, something I can explain but won't, nothing bad, just complicated. Yes, complicated. Deep sighs punctuated our walk today, out on familiar streets, picking off heads of lavender along the council strip, trying to mindfully take in the long, slow breaths my shoulders seem to need.
Ran into Phoebe while buying bread earlier. Talked of our respective Leonine birthdays, of sun salutations, about this city/country divide thing. Unprompted, she reminded me - a gift of a teacher, is she - that slowing down the breath will slow down more than just breathing. Helped to fix a few wayward thoughts, pull me back together.
Edward wrote a sweet message in my birthday card last week: "Thank you for making such delicious meals for us to eat. We are one of the few families we know who rarely eat the same meal twice." He's a vegetarian because I made them see how utterly satisfying vegetarian food could be. I doubt he'd have found his way there alone. Such beautiful, grown-up boys. They bring so much joy and light, and though not of my own making, at times, I know that really they are the adults they now are, in part, because of something I did that was very right.